Happy Easter!

This Ain't Right

The Comedy of Call Center Dog Training

As I have noted in the past, AKC dog registrations are falling so fast that they may have no dogs to register at all by 2025. See the numbers yourself.

So what is the AKC doing about that? They are in a bit of a pickle, as the culture of dogs in America has changed, and so too has the American social scene, but the AKC has not kept up with the times, and they continue to double down on deformed, defective and diseased breeds.

But suppose defective, diseased and deformed dogs were a business plan?  Suppose instead of being a business liability, they could be turned into a feature?

That seems to have been the AKC's thinking when they began to market themselves as a veterinary referral service.  We not only recommend defective dogs, we also recommend veterinarians to fix those dogs!  Perfect.

What?  You cannot afford all those expensive veterinary fixes?  No problem --the AKC sells pet insurance too!

Now the AKC has moved one step further, and they are offering a "hot line" where you can make a telephone call to a supposedly "expert" nameless, faceless dog trainer who, for all you know, is nothing more than a call center in Bangalore, India. 

The AKC writes:

"We have a special offer for you as the owner of a recently registered or listed dog with the AKC. The AKC^® GoodDog!^SM Helpline is a new telephone support service that provides dog owners with access to a live trainer. This service was developed for owners who need advice on training their dogs. There are no appointments to set-up, books to read or videos to watch. The AKC^® GoodDog!^SM Helpline uses only positive reinforcement training methods that are effective for both owners and their dogs. Best of all, this support is good for the life of your dog, so advice from puppyhood to the senior years will be just a phone call away! Visit us at AKC^® GoodDog!^SM Helpline to learn more and purchase at your special price of $59.99 (regularly $79.99)!"

Right.  Help is just one high-priced phone call away. 

This is "dog training" that involves no hard work or time since there are "no appointments to set-up, books to read or videos to watch."

And only positive reinforcement methods are used because that's exactly what works for all dogs and all problems in all situations, from deer chasing and cat killing to inter-pack aggression to food guarding.

Hysterical.

Oh, and never mind all those string leashes attached to too-thin choke chains that you will find being used in every AKC ring in the country. Those don't work. Just ask the nameless faceless expert dog trainer who is only one $60 phone call away. 

Operators ("live trainers!") are standing by.
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Coffee and Provocation

Cats Need 9-Lives in Australia
The Australians do not play around when it comes to feral cats and fox.  Hunters and land owners shoot them on sight and very serious poisons are used to try to eradicate them, all in order to try to protect native wildlife from small mammals to endemic birds.  One example: 3,000 feral cats were recently shot during a 16-day period in Queensland to keep them away from a 29-square-kilometer sanctuary designed to protect the endangered greater bilby (Macrotis lagotis), a defenseless, two and half pounds marsupial that looks like a cross between a mouse and a rabbit.

The Real Snake in the Garden of Eden Was Man
Scientists say humans wiped out almost a thousand species of birds--- most of them of the big, flightless and tasty variety -- from Pacific Islands during the Holocene period as early humans arrived a thousand years before the first Europeans.  I have written a little about this before -- see More People Meant Less Moa.

A Massive and Long-term Pedophilia Scandal Will Do That!
“According to Archbishop Diarmuid Martin of Dublin, in 1984, nearly 90 percent of Irish Catholics went to weekly Mass. In 2011, only 18 percent did.” Source.

Is Horse Slaughter Less Cruel Than No Slaughter?
Bloomberg editorial board member Marc Champion wonders whether the ban of horse slaughterhouses in the US has actually increased suffering for the animals, and whether there really is a good case for managing unwanted pet and feral horses as a meat market.  He notes:  "All things die, including horses. The attempt to prevent the U.S. from reopening slaughterhouses for the animals is surely foolish. Consider what has happened since the last horses were slaughtered in the U.S. in 2007, after Congress banned the Food and Drug Administration from funding the inspection of horse slaughterhouses. Since then, as a Bloomberg News story reports today, the number of horses that the U.S. ships out of the country to be slaughtered in other North American countries more than doubled, to 197,442. So in our anxiety to be more humane, we have subjected the animals to a long and inhumane truck ride before they meet the same end in other countries."

How Gun Paranoia is Benefiting Wildlife:
Thanks to massive amounts of wasteful gun and bullet buying by a poorly-informed public too easily manipulated by the NRA, a record $882 million in dedicated taxes was collected to be used by the states to fund wildlife and recreation protects.  Over $522 million will be used to acquire or long-term lease conservation and hunting lands under the Pittman-Robertson Act.  Want to know more about the Pittman Robertson program which has more than 40 MILLION acres of land set aside for citizen hunting all over the country?  Just click here.

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Evolution Education at the Doctor's Office

Some days, where you stand depends on where you sit. 

Sitting on a doctor's guerney with a serious infection tends to focus the mind. 

And if it does not, then God has a way of sorting that out so that only the smart survive.  It's called natural selection.
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How Could I Forget This?

Unasked for advice is as seed to pigeons in a park.

You can put it out, but the best you will get back is something you are not likely to want.

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Dogs Are Cool Like That

Dogs do not care if you are gay or straight, rich or poor, rural or urban, fat or thin. They do not care where you went to school, how much money you have in your bank account, or what god (if any) you believe in. Dogs are cool like that.


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Pfizer Pays for Another Rimadyl Death

Over at Pharmalot, they note that:

Two years after filing a widely publicized lawsuit, a Colorado couple has reached a settlement with Pfizer over allegations the drugmaker failed to sufficiently warn that its Rimadyl medication, a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory treatment for dogs, can cause severe harm. And now, the couple plans to take the proceeds to start a campaign to raise awareness about what they say are the dangers of the drug.

Yep, Rimdayl is not a completely safe drug.  It is, however, an extremely profitable drug for a veterinarian to prescribe. I have written about this before in a post entitled Rimadyl: Relief From a Swollen Wallet. As I note:

[A]lmost all Rimadyl sales by veterinarians for short-term use are a rip-off; you could be using buffered children's Aspirin or a low-dosage of Ibuprofen for a lot less money.

At the core of the scam you have drug company that has created a "me too" version of Ibuprofen that they sell through veterinarians. Veterinarians sell the drug at a big profit (more than 100 percent markup) and also create client dependency as folks have to come back in those cases where a recurring condition (like limber tail) might arise. The drug company makes a lot money, the veterinarian makes a lot of money, and you, the customer, are out of money

If you are interested in saving money and ditching Rimadyl (and the veterinary dependency that comes with it), be sure to read my post on aspirin and Ibuprofen use and dosage in dogs.

Dosage is critical with all drugs. As I note, "ANY medicine is a poison if it is not given in the proper dosage." And, just to put a point on it, Rimadyl might be the right drug for your dog in certain long-term-use cases. Again, see the link.

As for the Colorado dog that was the basis for this latest Rimadyl lawsuit, Pharmalot notes:

After two weeks in the hospital, tests showed severe liver degradation. By the end of July 2009, Sophie was dead. By then, the couple racked up about $30,000 in expenses and, after being alerted, Pfizer sent a check for $1,000, matching the average amount offered to pet owners who participated in the class-action lawsuit that was resolved in 2004. However, they rejected the payment (back story is here and you can click here for the lawsuit).

So how much was the settlement for?  Pfizer will not say and "the terms of the settlement are confidential" so we will never know. 

That said the owners of Sophie, the now-dead Colorado dog, are taking all of the settlement money they did get and are using it to launch an awareness campaign about the dangers of Rimadyl.  They have already created a "Friends of Sophie" web site and Facebook page. A brochure to be distributed to veterinarians will be forthcoming but, of course, that brochure will probably not matter in the slightest since Rimadyl sales are mostly about profit, not about efficacy or need.

As I noted in an earlier post about Rimadyl and the rather famous problems associated with other Cox-2 drugs:

Cox-2 drugs like Vioxx, Celebrex and Bextra have all been implicated in heart attacks and strokes in humans, and Vioxx was pulled after it was implicated in killing perhaps as many as 20,000 people. Bextra too has been pulled from the market, and Rimadyl, once sold to humans, is now only sold for veterinary use, under the theory that dogs do not typically suffer from hypertension.

Will your veterinarian tell you all this? Not likely! You see, there is too much money to be made selling Rimadyl

And has that changed?  Nope, not a bit.

• Related Posts:
  ** Rimadyl: Relief From a Swollen Wallet
  ** Is Your Veterinarian Clean? Don't Count On It.
  ** A Business Plan Based on Fencing Out the Truth
  ** Veterinary Trades Say It's Time to Rip-off the Rubes
  ** Pfizer, Pfrauds and Pfools
  ** Year Round Dosing for Big Veterinary Profits
  ** Low Cost All-Worm Treatment
  ** Lyme Disease: Hard to Catch and Easy to Halt
  ** The Billion Dollar Heartworm Scam
  ** The Billion Dollar Lyme Disease Scam
  ** Cruciate Ligament Injuries in Dogs
  ** Vet Pricing Has Nothing To Do With Care
  ** Glad We Could Help
  ** The Billion Dollar Vaccine Scam
  ** Antibiotics for Less Without a Prescription

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This is a Real Medical Paper?

Yes, it is.

And, NO, I have not yet read Headley, Fuck, Fuck, and Curti’s bitch paper. 

If someone is a member of the British Veterinary Association and would like to send me a PDF of the paper, I promise to read it and report out to the world.

“Ovarian Teratoma in a Bitch,” S.A. Headley, E.J. Fuck, E.T. Fuck, and C.E. Curti, Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association, vol. 191, no. 1, July 1, 1987, pp. 81-83. and also Veterinary Record, 2006 Apr 22;158(16):565-7

My understanding is that spaying prevents cancer of the uterus and ovaries in the same way that clear cutting prevents forest fires.

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Update:  Here is the paper, and I have to say it was less interesting than I had hoped as it deals with a single incident. The most alarmingly and eye-opening part of the paper was the fact that the owner went so long before taking in his dog despite the fact that "he had noticed an unusual increase in the size of the dog’s abdomen almost one year previously..."
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Doe, Doe on the Range

The story in The Sacramento Bee is summarized in this paragraph:

A day after confiscating a Rio Linda family's pet deer – saying chances were "very slim" they would release it into the wild – California Fish and Wildlife officials reversed course Wednesday and did so, alarming experts who say the doe won't be able to survive on her own.

People making deer pets is a big problem for the deer, as they inevitably end up in semi-suburban areas where lazy road-side hunters find them all too tempting.

This deer was going to end up dead one way or another, as no deer ever taken in as a backyard pet ever had a happy ending so far as I can tell. You think a hunter will not shoot a deer with a big red bell collar hanging from its neck? Experience proves you wrong!

The notion that deer cannot be "re-wilded" back into the forest is simply not true. 

Preston Doughty, who is president of Austin Wildlife Rescue in Texas and described as "a specialist in deer rehabilitation" says:

"She's going to walk right up to a dog or a horse or a human who will slash her throat."

Really? I kind of doubt it.

Deer are around horses all the time, and both seem to sort it out without too much bloodshed.

As for people and dogs, we might calm down a little here too, eh?

The notion that all people and dogs are psychotic killers is provably false.

Yes, dogs will chase deer, but remember that we actually have to teach most pet dogs to hunt and kill, and this wide-ranging "pet" deer has probably already seen a few chasing dogs and knows what they are about.

As for people, hunting season is eight or nine months off, and though I have spent a lot of time in the woods, I have not met too many people in the woods with big knives who were hell-bent on slashing deer throats.

We might remember too that animals "rewild" all the time. Ask anyone who has dealt with feral cats or feral dogs. Ask any falconer who has released his passage birds after a year or two. Ask any wildlife rehabilitator who has taken in a baby animal, nursed it back to health, and dumped it out of a pet container and into the wild again.

This deer was already roaming the family's rural property in Rio Linda -- it was not in a paddock fed from a grain trough.

This deer was already eating wild food on its own, even as it grew parasitic on extra backyard handouts.

Will this deer do fine if it is released in deep woods with patches of good meadows around? The Department of Natural Resources think so, and they are willing to release it rather than simply kill it. That seems like a good decision to me.

That said, deer do not liver forever, do they? 

The average deer in America is dead at age 3 or 4.  A very old big deer is no more than age 6 or7. 

So will this deer eventually be killed by a car (as its mother was), or a hunter, or die from disease, starvation or predation? 

Count on it.  We all owe Mother Nature a death. 

For this particular doe, however, the call on that debt is not this week.  Why is that a bad thing?
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Barney's Owner

This would have been me in 1981. I was going to college and living in Oberlin, Ohio in the big Queen Anne-style house behind me, which backed up to a farm which, in turn backed up to a reservoir and a small bit of forest. 

My dog in these days was Barney, another mutt terrier rescued off the streets.  He was a great dog.  I was known as Barney's owner, which tells you quite a lot about the both of us.
 

House Porn of the Day

It's been a while since I put up any "house porn," so here you go.

This one is an 1855 Victorian in Worcester, New York.  Asking price:  $650,000 which includes 190 acres.

Private elegant compound in the Northwestern Catskills. Lovely 1855 Italianate Victorian house and barn.

Sited on 190 spectacular acres with mountain views, trout stream, clay bottomed swimming pond, perennial beds, fruit trees and stone patio. Thoughtful sophisticated renovation.

This 3,500 sq ft home and gardens are in excellent condition. 10 ft high ceilings, original moldings, and hard wood flooring, smart layout with great flow. 4 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms.

It is coupled with a 5,000 sq ft post and beam barn that is totally renovated. The barn workshop/studio could provide a professional artists studio or a turnkey upscale woodworking operation. It is fully heated with separate zones, plumbed and has a top floor that could be guest quarters or house a nanny. This configuration could provide an opportunity to work and live full time in the country ending the dependence on city life.

Accessible from the New York thruway, 50 minutes to Albany and Amtrak, 30 minutes to Cooperstown. More pictures and information on website: http://www.centervalleyhome.com

 

Rabbiting with Terriers, 1900

Click to enlarge.
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Coffee and Provocation

• Is Lyme Disease an Alien Life Form?
  The pathogen that causes Lyme Disease -- Borrelia burgdorferi -- does not run on iron like every other life form on earth. Instead, it depends on manganese, which means that when the liver produces hepcidin to fight the infection, that natural iron-inhibiting hormone does nothing to starve the pathogen, which is why Lyme disease is so robust absent a good dosing of Doxycline.
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• Zeuterin Sterilization for Dogs:
  The FDA is expected to green light Zeuterin as a new, safe, cheaper and faster way to sterilize male dogs age three to ten months.  Zeuterin  is a solution of zinc gluconate, a natural spermicide, which is injected into each testicle leaving it incapable of producing sperm. No anesthesia is needed, and the dog will continue to have about half its normal testosterone production, which has health benefits.  Dogs that have been "Zeutered" will have a microchip implanted that notes that fact and/or will be tattooed with a number that includes the letter "z".
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• Falcon Genes Sequenced for First Time:
  Scientists from Cardiff University in Wales have sequenced the genome of peregrine and saker falcons for the first time.
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• Mark Kleiman to Become Washington State's First Pot Czar:
  The first marijuana licensing and control official for the state of Washington is Mark Kleiman, someone I have mentioned before in the context of operant conditioning for criminals, which is exactly like operant conditioning for dogs and other forms of wildlife.  See Training Humans like Dogs and Watch the Cows.
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• Border Patrol Uniforms Made in Mexico?
  Yep, that seems to be the case.  And why not?  Remember that every self-righteous union organizer is standing in front of you in clothes that are made overseas and advocating for a massive amnesty for illegal aliens that came to America in order to take a job that would have gone to an American if decent wages and working conditions had been offered.
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• The Sheep are Worried, the Dog is Dead:
  A friend who rescues dogs in the U.K. just had one of her very fine rescues shot for sheep worrying.  Sheep worrying is as big an issue in the U.K. as deer chasing here in the U.S., but in the U.K. they have removed the best tool to end it.  Saying no to e-collars means saying yes to shooting dogs and dogs being killed in traffic due to chasing deer.  Read what Temple Grandin says about that.
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• Bill and Melinda Gates Want a Better Condom:
  Too much information?  No, really, they are just trying to save the world and a few million lives by making sex a little more fun. All good. All very good.
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• And While We're Trying to Save the World:
  Dean Kamen (the inventor of the Segway and hundreds of other things) and Coca Cola have partnered to put the Slingshot freshwater machine into villages across Africa.  This is a machine that can process 50 gallons of filthy water (including pure urine) into distilled water as fast as you can say "Bob's your uncle."
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• Maybe This Priority Is Not as Twisted as It Sounds:
  A new U.S. Study says more people in the world now have cell phones than modern toilets.  Crazy?  Not really.  Remember, a cell phone can bring you information, a new way of living, a job, personal security, political power, and even tell you where you need to go.
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• Even When the Cat Wins, It Loses:
  A male mountain lion that grabbed a pet Dachshund off its leash as it was being walked in a gated community near Colorado Springs, Colorado has been trapped and euthanized by state wildlife officials who deemed the big cat a threat to public safety.

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Mildred Loving at the Supreme Court

Mildred Jeter Loving and Richard Loving, 1965.

Mildred Jeter Loving and her husband, Richard, refused to accept Virginia's ban on interracial marriage.

Their opposition to the racist marriage laws of Fairfax, Virginia (now the richest County in America), led to a U.S. Supreme Court decision that, in 1967, struck down similar racist marriage laws across the country.

Yes, the current President of the United States is the product of a marriage that was illegal in many states back when he was born.

Imagine.

That was then, this is now, and a similar ban on same sex marriage is now before the U.S. Supreme Court.

May the spirit of Mildred Jeter Loving look down on the Supreme Court and guide their hand.

Let Loving guide the way.
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All My Dogs Wear a Red Clay Halo

 

All the girls all dance with the boys from the city,

And they don't care to dance with me.

Now it ain't my fault that the fields are muddy,

And the red clay stains my feet.

And it's under my nails and it's under my collar,

And it shows on my Sunday clothes.

Though I do my best with the soap and the water,

But the damned old dirt won't go.
 

Where I Go :: Natalie Merchant

Climbing under  a barbed wire fence by the railroad ties
Climbing over the old stone wall, I'm bound for the riverside...
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Gideon Rides an Iron Horse

Blaming the Groundhog

It's snowing at the end of March and as a consquence there are calls for criminal charges and the beheading of the weather-predicting groundhog Punxsutawney Phil. 

Please.  Phil never claimed to predict the weather -- that was something others claimed for him, and it was all a small government con that became a big government con.  Phil had nothing to do with it!

Snow! On March 25th!

A Dog Is Not a Shovel

A great sadness in the world of dogs are owners who fail to recognize that dogs are fully sentient beings that need more than food, water, shelter, and sanitation. Dogs also need mental stimulation and exercise every day, no exceptions.

This means that if you kennel your dogs twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, you are failing your dogs. In fact, you are treating your dogs worse than the most hardened of psychopathic criminals on death row.

And yet, how often do we see this? All the time!

Go to any commercial breeding or long-term boarding kennel, and you will see cage after cage of dogs deprived of the most basic kind of mental stimulation. Most are rarely walked or even turned out from their cages. Instead, a high-pressure water hose is used to blast feces into the scuppers. The gate to the kennel run may not be opened in a week

This is not a life. This is abuse.

“Abuse?! But that’s the way we’ve always done it!”

Right.

Slavery and torture are also ancient traditions, but that doesn’t make them right does it?

We need to do better than this.

Dogs are not inanimate property. If you leave a shovel out in the rain and snow, it is of no concern to the state. But do the same thing to a dog, and not only will the state step in – it may fine you, remove your dog and, in extreme cases, jail you.

While there may be no legal obligation to provide exercise and mental stimulation for your dog, failure to live up to this responsibility is at the core of many, if not most, dysfunctional relationships.

Job One then is exercise and mental stimulation. Satisfy your dog’s needs in this regard, and you are half way home.

 

Ram Skull & Horns

This was a very nice goat sheep skull and horns at Luckett's, that came with a very nice metal stand. I did not buy it, but I admired it. Is it a Corsican Sheep skull or a Merino Sheep skull? I am not sure if you can tell the breed of a sheep just from the horns, and the label did not say. Not a Nubian goat!

Dogs Are Not Children

A dog is Canis lupus familiaris, not Homo sapiens bambino.

Accepting a dog for what it is, is the cornerstone of having a correct relationship.

Dogs drink from puddles, bark routinely, bite on occasion, and turn around three times before they curl up in the grass.

You cannot warn a dog about consequences, or explain to them why you are taking away their allowance. A dog does not have morality, does not believe in heaven, and does not fear hell.

Dogs consider it normal to roll in animal feces and to eat them too. They greet each other by sniffing each other’s butts, and they often drink from toilets because they do not have hands to turn on a tap.

Many dogs have strong prey drives, and some will kill your neighbor's cat as quick as you can say "Bob's your uncle."

In short, your dog is not your “fur baby.”

Do not deny the nature of a dog or its particular needs, any more than you would a tiger or a hummingbird.

And yet, look around. So many people insist on treating dogs as children. What’s going on here?

Most of the time, it’s a classic case of displacement -- a childless woman, gay man, or senior citizen transferring maternal or paternal needs to a dog.

To be clear, there is nothing wrong with treating a dog well, or even doting on it, provided that the dog is not allowed to run riot and basic discipline is imposed.

That said, it’s important to realize dogs do not see the world the way we do. What an owner sees as an act of beneficence, a dog is likely to see as weakness to be exploited.

The bottom line is that a dog’s owner must set the rules, establish the routines, and decide what behaviors are permitted and which are not.

And yes, this means the dog must be subordinate to you.

It’s not a question of being mean or not caring. Quite the opposite. It’s a question of providing the dog with the clarity it needs to know it is not an equal in the household.

A dog is a dog, and a dog is less than the owner, less than the spouse, less than a child, and less than any human guest.

If there is any question about this in the mind of either you or the dog, the basis for a less-than-satisfactory relationship is set.

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Lucy Surveys the Last Snow

Austin sends this picture from Blacksburg.

Original X-Pen Made of Wood

This was for sale at Luckett's. An old wooden x-pen for dogs. Seemed to be one piece -- I could not figure out where it joined together or how to fold it down.
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We Were Happy

Head Like a 9-Pound Hammer

Gideon in a bird bath at Luckett's Store (antiques and junk) in Lucket's, Virginia.   This is just a short ride over on the Jubal Early at White's Ferry, Marlyand. A fun day.

Coffee and Provocation

• Lyme disease reduction comes when you root out invasive Barberry? Apparently.  At least on some lands eliminating invasive Japanese Barberry results in an 80 percent reduction in ticks and the Lyme disease that they can carry.
 
• National Geographic has a terrific new Tumblr blog that you should put in you RSS feed.  Great old pictures in large format.  Everything to love, love, love.
 
• If your RSS feeder has been Google Reader, you probably know that is going away very soon.  So what to replace it with?  I am using Feedly, and I have to say I wish I had found it sooner.  A marked improvement, and they make it ridiculously easy to pull all your Google Reader links into the new system.  Check it out!
 
• Best and truest Onion article ever:  Find The Thing You’re Most Passionate About, Then Do It On Nights And Weekends For The Rest Of Your Life.
 
• Is elimination of tapeworms around the corner?  Maybe.  Turns out they have an Achilles' heel,  Read all about it.
 
• Sometimes the dachshund gets the cat, sometimes the cat gets the dachshund.  It's the circle of life (cue "Lion King" music).
 
• Social Farting may be one of the best PSA's of all time, because it nails a persistent demographic and hits it with a toxic dart.
 
• Bill Gates thinks meatless meat meals are right around the corner and that they will not only be healthier and cheaper, but better environmentally and -- most important of all -- they will actually taste and look just like meat.  Gates’ self-published multimedia, slide-show piece, “The Future of Food,” is very well done and convincing in a technologist-meets-futurist-philanthropist kind of way.
 
• Cold-pressed extra-virgin olive oil may have an extra benefit: it appears to be more filling than other fats and blocks sugar absorption, therefore adding fewer calories over time.  Use more olive oil -- and read my friend Tom Mueller's book on the subject -- excellent!
 
• Make calorie data meaningful.  How far do you have to walk to burn off those calories?  Put that kid of information on the side of a food package and things might change quickly.
 
• Apple Computer says it now uses 100% renewable energy for its data centers and 75% for its needs overall -- up from 35% in 2010.
 
• Can Bee Venom Cure HIV?  Maybe.

Grifting: The New Veterinary Stock in Trade

Have you noticed that your veterinarian spends more time looking at you than at your dog or cat?

What's going on there? 

Well, one thing that is going on is that your veterinarian is being encouraged to become a grifter -- someone who is supposed to get inside your perimeter wire so they can then lift your wallet.

A grifter is simply someone who is playing a confidence game. There are variations on the theme -- long cons, short cons, affinity cons -- but all of them have one thing in common; they prey on human weakness.

Veterinary grifters are not practicing fee-for-service medicine so much as they are sizing up their customers -- the suckers -- so they can figure out exactly how many worthless services they can sack them with, how deep a dependency model they can push, and how steep a bill can be presented.

Think I am kidding?  Ah, well you probably do not read the veterinary economics literature.  The good news is that I do.

Over at the Canadian Veterinary Journal, for example, Amanda Reinoisch writes about the "human-animal bond" (HAB in the lingo of the modern veterinary grifter).  You have heard folks talk about it, perhaps.  Do you know what it means, and why veterinarians talk about it so much?

A trend has recently been identified in the United States that indicates people are willing to spend more money on their pet’s health. When queried as to what was most important when choosing a companion animal veterinarian, price was not ranked first, but rather, reputation and a caring and empathetic attitude were among the most important factors. In this recent study, individuals who spent money on their pet’s health were more likely to be married, have a higher than average income, live in a rural area, and indicate their race was “white”.

This study also demonstrated that there is a large and growing portion of the population who own companion animals, as evidenced by the purchase of products such as animal feed, but are not consuming a proportionate increase in the use of veterinary services. The authors hypothesized that this differential growth between pet ownership and consumption of veterinary services may be due to increasing cultural differences in the changing population of the United States. The authors concluded that a large portion of the companion animal market has yet to be tapped....

... It has been almost a decade since the landmark reports of the KPMG  and the Brakke investigations into the economic state of the veterinary profession in the USA. These reports both identify the HAB as a potential component of companion animal practice management.

So what part does the HAB play in the evolving economic and social reality of pet ownership and care? The history of the HAB in academic veterinary medicine has recently been reviewed. An additional and parallel concept of “bond-centered” practice (BCP) has also emerged in the practice of veterinary medicine and in the education of veterinary students.

Some authors have suggested that the HAB is a conceptual construct. The literature would better support a working theory that the HAB is a legitimate field of sociological and psychological investigation, and the BCP is an applied business theory. The BCP business model suggests that veterinary practices can provide a better service (and be more profitable) if they de-emphasize the goal of dealing with the health of the companion animal and spend more time attending to the emotional needs of the companion animal’s owner. If taken to the extreme where the client’s perception is the reality then patient health outcomes could become disassociated from practice success.

Dr. Bernard Rollin argues that in order for a veterinarian to make a successful living they must be “liked” by their clients. A veterinarian must be able to convince the client to commit to treatment regimes. It is likely that to foster this level of trust in a veterinary-client-patient relationship the veterinarian and the client need to be like-minded. No one doubts the emotional challenge of some individuals dealing with companion animal loss, and that empathy is appropriate in veterinary practice (recognition of the HAB). However, ethical reflection may illuminate concerns related to making “grief” a profit center for your business (institutionalization and application of the BCP business model). However, it is possible to have a very satisfied, strongly bonded client with a very unhealthy management style for their pet such as the lovingly overfed, obese dog. Supplementing the rather instrumental economic model; the articulated driving philosophy of BCP is well-developed, holistic, and includes a reverence for animal life.

Companion animal veterinarians are not the only (self-funded) profession to develop BCP-like services in support of the human-animal bond. Psychologists and lawyers are beginning to benefit from providing services in response to people’s emotional attachments to their pets. It has been suggested that psychologists work with veterinarians to educate them about the grieving process.The implementation and management of a “bond-centered practice” has also been promoted to the profession through professional continuing education meetings and the American Association of Human-Animal Bond Veterinarians.

Right. 

Grifters also have conventions and schools -- places where you learn the art of the dangle, the pigeon drop, and the lonely widow. So, no surprise to learn that there are trade associations that teach veterinarians how to grift using the psychological manipulation of their clients.

The core tool that veterinary grifters use is the same tool that "pure positive" dog trainers use -- the dog owner's inflated sense of self, and the fear of being judged by someone who claims expertise.

"You're not listening to those old, outdated, abusive, non-scientific dog trainers are you?"

"You want what is the very best and most modern medicine for Tricky-Woo, don't you?"

"You don't want any risk, right?"

"I mean, our pets are like family, right?  I just don't understand people who are willing to pay $3,000 a year for car repair, but who will not do the same for their cat or dog."

"Sure it's expensive.  But you would get all these tests for yourself, or for your son or daughter, right?"

And so it goes.

The customers practically tee themselves up to be ripped off because so often their relationship with their cat or dog really is their primary emotional connection to any other living thing on the planet. No husband?  No kids?  Aged widow?  Perfect!

And so the table is set.

The veterinarian, or the pure-positive dog trainer, presents as someone who understands and who is a fellow member of the tribe of Deep Emotional Attachment to a pet.  Sure this person is really nothing more than a profiteer engaged in the psychological manipulation of his or her vulnerable mark.  Of course.  But you cannot fault them, can you?  Birds got to fly, grifters got to grift.

And so the selling pitch is all about working the emotional connection.  It's not about a discrete medical or training problem that can be fixed by straight-forward fee-for-service work. "That's not how we are thinking about pets these days" you may be told.You want to be modern right?  Well, of course you do!

And so, to demonstrate you care about your pet, and in order to win the approval of this fellow member of the Tribe of the Special Pet Relationship whose is your friend, you now need to shell out money without meter and to not ask too many questions about what you are getting for it.

"Yes, pets ARE expensive" you will be told if you hesitate for even a second.

"The good news is that we sell pet insurance which you can buy for your next dog or cat!"

And so it goes.

In the end it's not so very different from coffin sales grifters who tell you, right at the top of their pitch, that "of course you want what is best for Grandma Lucille."

Then, without missing a beat, they point you to a $10,000 dollar casket and a $10,000 dollar funeral service and, feeling guilty because you did not call Grandma Lucille very much that last year (or spend enough time walking and throwing the ball for your dog) you fold like a dish towel. The hook is in, and the grift is on.  You have been taken like the pigeon you always were.

If it's all been done well, you tell everyone that the only reason Tricky Woo is even alive today is because of that nice veterinarian who made you feel so good and noble about yourself as they quietly lifted your wallet, price-gouged you, and sold you a plate of medically unnecessary services.

And if Trick Woo died?

No problem. The modern veterinarian knows you will be getting another pet within a month or two, and so a nice condolence card will come in the mail expressing deep sympathy for your recent loss.

Don't worry, that card isn't free; they'll charge you an extra $200 for it when you come in for that first "well puppy checkup" with the new dog.   

"Oh, you got 12-week old Nestor from the pound? We must do a heartworm check and a Lyme test too just to make sure... in case.  You wouldn't want to risk anything, would you?"

And so it goes. 

Birds got to fly.  Grifters got to grift.
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The Continuing Crisis

British gossip magazine cover blurb.
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Thursday Morning, 4:30 A.M.

This is the sound that woke me up at 4:30 this morning. The terriers were still inside, asleep in their beds.

Normally, I hear this in December or January, but life is never simple or cut with square corners.


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Fight For This

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This is what pro-life looks like -- it's pro-kids and pro-love and pro-marriage and pro-equality.  Justice Roberts, are you listening??
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Stop Getting Ripped Off by Price-Gouging Vets

Every dog man worth his salt knows how to save big money by doing several small things;

1. Vaccinate your dogs yourself. Every veterinary supply catalogue sells vaccines, which are very easy to give. Kennel owners are not going to the vets to give their dogs their shots, and after that first year they are not revaccinating their dogs.
   
   
2. Treat small flesh wounds and ear and urinary tract infections with nonprescription antibiotics sold in every dog veterinary catalogue on that "mysterious" page devoted to fish pharamaceuticals. Now you know why that page is there!
   
   
3. Worm your dogs yourself.  You do not have to do it often, it costs very little, and a good three-worm medicine is sold in every veterinary catalogue.
   
   
4. Small wounds can be closed with crazy glue. Crazy glue is the same as VetBond, and every construction worker and dog man has been using it to close cuts for the last 30 years.
   
   
5. Heartworm medication does not have to cost very much. In fact, it should cost very little as the active ingredient (made by the same maker as Heartgard) is sold by the gallon at feed stores). No reason to mix your own (and quite a few reasons not to). I order mine from JR Enterprises.

Disturbing British Gossip Magazine Cover Blurb

Friendly Neighborhood Serial Killer

Over at the Earth in Transition blog, Michael Mountain, one of the founders of the "No Kill" movement, writes about the latest study which shows that free-ranging domestic cats in America kill 1.4–3.7 BILLION birds and 6.9–20.7 BILLION  mammals annually:

Why would we be surprised by any of this? Wasn't it their hunting ability that led cats to become our best friends in the first place?

Read the whole thing, but I applaud the fact that Mountain notes that the collateral killing of wildlife by abandoned pets is not limited to cats:

Currently, in Florida, we have another wildlife catastrophe on our hands. Tens of thousands of Burmese pythons (some say up to 180,000) are loose in the Everglades as a result of criminally irresponsible "pet owners" and former breeders dumping their unwanted "pets" out in the wild. Pythons grow very large – up to 17 feet long – and can swallow a deer for dinner. A female python can have up to a hundred eggs. Entire populations of rabbits and foxes have disappeared from the Everglades, and populations of raccoons, opossums and bobcats have dropped as much as 99 percent.

Right.

And what is Florida doing about feral Burmese pythons?

Well, for one thing, the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission has launched a hunting competition with cash prizes to people who can kill the most pythons.  "No license or experience needed -- just a gun or a knife."

Notice that no one has objected to that!
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Another from the Vault

My guess is that I am about 5 or six in this photo. The dog is Scoot. The shirt is from Sears.  Scoot's grave is below.
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