A dog is Canis lupus familiaris, not Homo sapiens bambino.
Accepting a dog for what it is, is the cornerstone of having a correct relationship.
Dogs drink from puddles, bark routinely, bite on occasion, and turn around three times before they curl up in the grass.
You cannot warn a dog about consequences, or explain to them why you are taking away their allowance. A dog does not have morality, does not believe in heaven, and does not fear hell.
Dogs consider it normal to roll in animal feces and to eat them too. They greet each other by sniffing each other’s butts, and they often drink from toilets because they do not have hands to turn on a tap.
Many dogs have strong prey drives, and some will kill your neighbor's cat as quick as you can say "Bob's your uncle."
In short, your dog is not your “fur baby.”
Do not deny the nature of a dog or its particular needs, any more than you would a tiger or a hummingbird.
And yet, look around. So many people insist on treating dogs as children. What’s going on here?
Most of the time, it’s a classic case of displacement -- a childless woman, gay man, or senior citizen transferring maternal or paternal needs to a dog.
To be clear, there is nothing wrong with treating a dog well, or even doting on it, provided that the dog is not allowed to run riot and basic discipline is imposed.
That said, it’s important to realize dogs do not see the world the way we do. What an owner sees as an act of beneficence, a dog is likely to see as weakness to be exploited.
The bottom line is that a dog’s owner must set the rules, establish the routines, and decide what behaviors are permitted and which are not.
And yes, this means the dog must be subordinate to you.
It’s not a question of being mean or not caring. Quite the opposite. It’s a question of providing the dog with the clarity it needs to know it is not an equal in the household.
A dog is a dog, and a dog is less than the owner, less than the spouse, less than a child, and less than any human guest.
If there is any question about this in the mind of either you or the dog, the basis for a less-than-satisfactory relationship is set.
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Sunday, March 24, 2013
Dogs Are Not Children
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4 comments:
"A dog is a dog, and a dog is less than the owner, less than the spouse, less than a child, and less than any human guest."
I was with you 'till you got to the last bit.
I've had human guests (now former friends) who could not be dissuaded from teasing the dog, or behaving in other inappropriate ways re the dog. I showed them the door and disinvited them back.
I suppose you could say that I threw them out because they would not respect my wishes in my home. But it was equally because they did not respect my dog.
My dog is not spoiled. She is expected to respect my guests, and she does so. If they cannot manage to return the favor, then I see them as less than the dog.
Boo Roy, I have no idea how long you have been around dogs and dog people, but I have more than a few decades in grade, and child displacement issues exist, no matter how uncomfortable that fact might make you. In fact, the phenomenon is so clear and ingrained that a the mose famous dog culture movie (Best in Show) centered on it, as did the TV Show "Show Dog Moms and Dads". Every dog trainer has seen the phenomenon again and again, and the bias, as I have set it out, is as clear as a dinner bell. People are animals, and diplacement occurs with animals as well as people -- why baby tigers can be nursed by dogs.
Geonni, I have never had anyone mess with my dogs, and it would be a short day if it happened, as I can train people much faster and with more clarity than I can a dog!
That said, if you look at people with out of control dogs, they think it is perfectly OK for the dogs to snarl and snap at family members or visitors ("he's just protecting me") and they do not correct the dog and quite often comfort it and reinforce the behavior.
The result is a dog that thinks it is rather high up in status in the house -- a bad thing for the dog to think, as it only takes one bite of a visiting kid for the dog to be put down.
Dogs are used to pecking orders, and while they need to know they are loved, you do not need to elevate the status of the dog to that of child, spouse, or even a visitor for the dog to be loved and happy.
I routinely get asked what to do about dogs that snap. Very often they are little dogs like Yorkies and Maltese. I ask the owners what they do when the dog does that. They look at me blankly. They are supposed to do something??! It had never occured to them that they can tell their dog no, toss them off their lap and the couch, and tie them up at the other end of the room after a scolding. More often, the dog snarls and snaps, and the owner rushes into to "reassure" the dog -- the exact opposite of what they should be doing. Result: a dog that thinks its job is to snap and bark at visitors, and that it has a status only just under that of the owner. It's a ridiculous situation, but as common as crabgrass.
And if one needs further evidence of irrational relationships so common today is to peruse the multitude of 'pet friendlies' and 'pet lovely' sites, facespaces, and blogs that pronounce the very thing..most are clueless with shields full up and finger on the trigger to bombast anyone with rationale conception.
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