Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Are Your Rapture-Ready?

As most of you know by now, the end of the world is scheduled for late in the day on May 21st when The Rapture begins and the world of man ends. 

You are prepared of course, but what about your pets?

Good News (pun intended).  The pagans have come up with a solution

Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable.  

For $135.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $20.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged and feathered friends.

If you truly believe in Jesus, you will post this to your Facebook wall all day.


cinci_celine said...


seeker said...

As I have said for many years and very loudly, If dogs don't go to heaven, I don't want to go. Having been kicked out of catachism class multiple times as a child for espousing this belief, I was extremely pleased when Pope John Paul II agreed with me that 'also the animals possess a soul and men must love and feel solidarity with our smaller brethren'.
So, I'm thinking that the selfish lot that published this offer won't have any animals left to care for. But the good people whose money is taken won't care cause money won't be needed where they are going anyway.
Meanwhile, I do recommend that you put your animals in your will to insure their lives continue happily if you happen to die before the rapture. Working with the PD, I discovered that many a beloved pet was dumped at the local pound by families when people either passed or had to go into assisted living due to an illness. Most relatives are unwilling or unable to care for a pet especially one like a Jack Russell, or PitBull or even a horse. Find someone who is willing to take care of your pet and insure that the trusted person does get custody of it and if possible with a little stipend to help pay for its care.

Debi and the TX JRTs

Seahorse said...

And wear clean underwear on the 21st!


jeff hays said...

I had the pets in heaven argument with an evangelical idiot a few years ago.
I TOLD HIM that by loving our animals they a little piece of our soul, so naturally they are in heaven waiting for us.
He was unable to respond to that and moved on to the next mark .