If someone tells you they want a PUPPY, your radar should rotate forward.
Notice that they did not say they wanted a dog. They said they wanted a puppy. What's going on with this person?
Maybe it's simply a bad choice of words. Maybe they actually do want a dog, but want the full experience of going through the "can't-help-pissing-on-the-carpet" stage of life (Oh Joy!).
But we all know there's another type of broken person out there, don't we?
These are the people who end up treating dogs like children. The problems that comes from that kind of behavior iare legion, are they not?
And then there are the people who acquire puppies and then abandon them when they cease to be "cute" and start to be difficult. There are a few million examples of that kind of behavior every year in this country.
Dog acquisition as a form of child-displacement is a fairly widespread kind of behavior pattern. In a 2009 post on the comedy of dog shows I wrote about a rather famous movie which gave a strong hat tip to this aspect of doggy-obsessive culture:
Many of the "normal" people that frequent dog shows are slightly odd, and more than a handful seem to be trying to compensate for the absence of children in their lives by dressing up their dogs, dancing with their dogs... Frustrated maternal instincts from both straight and gay couples are worn on the sleeve for anyone who takes the time to look for them...."
There is the childless 55-year old who buries herself in her seven lap dogs.... the 17-25 year old who acquires a pet as a "test baby" for the children to come later.... the unmarried spinster (that horrible word!) who becomes a dog hoarder instead of a cat hoarder.... the gay couple
Many times these dogs acquisitions work out fine, but sometimes they do not, in part because the person in question may really have wanted a human baby, and not an adult dog.
So is there an alternative? Is there a Third Way to fill the "hole in the soul" that some childless people seem to feel?
Maybe.
Watch the video, below.
Does this video creep you out a little bit? Me too. But that's almost exactly how I feel when I see extreme examples of displaced maternalism (and occassionally paternalism) in the world of dogs.
The good news with "reborn babies" is that they never die, they never piss on the carpet, they never need veterinary care, and they never end up at the pound after growing up untrained and undisciplined.
Can we could say the same about dogs? Sadly, no.
3 comments:
These clearly fill a niche. That poor woman with the doves at her wedding! I don't know how to tell if the dolls are a better choice for her than a dog. A dog might have brought her into a different world.
On the other hand at least its harmless which you can't say about abandoned pets. Interesting post, I didn't know about this phenomenon.
Kathy
I appreciate your encouraging people to adopt dogs, which I have done myself, but would like to see you write about the downside. You are very likely to get an animal with behavioral problems that would have been prevented had you or someone socialized the animal properly.
Based on me and/or my dog getting attacked on walks in my affluent suburban area, I'd say at least 50 percent of dogs are poorly socialized. I've been threatened or my dog menaced several times by Labs, for heaven's sake.
So at the pound, you are almost certain to adopt a dog with problems stemming from neglect. I love ours, but she has severe separation anxiety and a couple other issues that I feel are the result of poor socialization when young. This seems to be common with pound dogs, and in one case I know of it was crippling to the dog, a Doberman, and onerous for the owner. Another couple I know adopted a Lab who kind of scares me. They love her and it's working out, and it saved the dog's life, but I'm glad they don't have small children anymore.
You say because some of your affluent neighbors have poorly trained or socialized dogs, you think all, or a lot of rescue/pound dogs have temperament or socialization problems?
Seriously? Pretty sure you need to sit that idea down a bit and work with it. Most folks in rich neighborhoods (I live in one) have pedigree dogs and know nothing about dog training, and take no time with their dogs at all. Besides, canine-on-canine aggression may or may not have anything to do with socialization. It's more complicated than that. My bet is that most of the dogs you see are doing a little human guarding because they have not been instructed that that is not their job. That's training, not necessarily socialization.
But set that aside. Do you yourself have any experience visiting local canine rescues? Any experience getting a dog from there? I have. (Yes, I have gotten rescue dogs from Ohio!)
I think that first contact with your very own local rescue will change your theory, and the good news is that you can do it TOMORROW.
You live near Columbus, Ohio. Here's a nice outfit with likely looking dogs >> http://www.powellpaws.org/adopt-a-dog-powell-animal-welfare-society
Why not stop by tomorrow, from 10 AM - 12 PM, Saturday, March 1. and see some adorable adoptable dogs while you pick up some pet supplies for your own?
Any of these two locations are holding adoption events tomorrow:
7549 Sawmill Road
Dublin, OH 43016
5125 Hampsted Village Center Way
New Albany, OH 43054
The phone is 614) 775-5555
Report out. Pet the dogs. Walk with the dogs and notice they are not fighting each other -- there will be 10 or more of them hanging out quietly and friendly in the store.
For other readers, check out the dogs in your own area at your local pet store adoption events. Seriously. It's pretty easy to find "meet and greets" going on most Saturdays at local pet stores. Friendly dogs and young people doing good work fostering them. I have acquired dogs this way -- in fact, I have done so recently, and that little fellow is as quiet, gentle, cute and ridiculously happy as any dog I have ever known.
But see for yourself. I think experience is the cure for the theory. Go to a pet store adoption event and see what you find in terms of temperament and adoption.
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