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| The bears of Elisha |
It's time for God to thin the herd and unleash a wave of Grizzly Bears to kill at least one whack-job on the religious right.
That's the conclusion I reached after Marge W. sent me a story about Bryan Fischer, the "Director of Issues Analysis" for the conservative, hate-spewing "Christian" group called the American Family Association.
Mr. Fischer writes that we need to kill all the Grizzly Bears in Yellowstone National Park:
One human being is worth more than an infinite number of grizzly bears. Another way to put it is that there is no number of live grizzlies worth one dead human being. If it’s a choice between grizzlies and humans, the grizzlies have to go. And it’s time.....
God makes it clear in Scripture that deaths of people and livestock at the hands of savage beasts is a sign that the land is under a curse.
Right. Mr. Fisher is obviously an idiot.
More to the point he's also a Biblical ignorant who does not know that Bears are an instrument of God.
But don't take my word for it.
Go to your Bible and read the story of Elisha and the bears at 2 Kings 2:23-25.
There we find that God sends KILLER BEARS to do his work.
And for the record, Elisha is not just "a Jewish thing." Among Christians, Elisha is venerated as Saint Eliseus, and in Islam he is know as Al-Yasa. This is basic religion.
Everywhere He goes, the Bears of God follow.
But apparently, this is new information to Bryan Fischer.
Which is why I am asking every reader of this blog to bow their head and ask God to send Grizzly Bears to school this fool who would besmirch the Good Original Design of God's own miraculous creation.
We Prey in the name of Elisha, Saint Eliseus, and Al Yasa .... AMEN.
8 comments:
HIs mind is made up, do not confuse him the the facts or the truth.
Hell if I'll ever use the term "baldy" again! That is some seriously vengeful shit.
Seahorse
This goes beyond regular "god complex" kinda crap. This person has an obvious personality disorder at best... this is a cry for help, when someone starts preaching about the extinction of any species who has killed a man.
Canadian Geese get sucked into planes and kill people all the time.
Eradicate the killer geese!!
Patrick,
You've made the same mistake as Mr. Fischer. You're using God as a weapon against your enemies... rhetorically or not, you've presumed that God must agree with you because you're opinion is so clearly correct.
The world would be a better place if we humans would stop telling God what to think.
Wait, aren't human beings the biggest killer of other human beings? There's a logic disconnect here somewhere . . .
No, the world would be a better place if religion took a back seat to science, logic, fact and history.
Like say... mythology.
Pestilence, you assume I believe in God.
I would not assume ;-)
All I have done is quote someone else's instruction manual and made-up-fairly tales (which they believe to be literal truth) back to them.
In short, I have held up a mirror and revealed their ignorance about their own Book.
You might also pay attention to how I spell the action I called for. I did not say "let us pray," but "let us prey."
Welcome to the First Church of Field and Stream, the only church not under "new management."
P.
Better yet, send the Giants from the bible!!!
Genesis6:1
And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them, 2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose. 3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also is flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years. 4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them, the same became mighty men which were of old, men of renown.
http://www.greatdreams.com/reptlan/giants.htm
Then we would have got rid of the idiot and have proof of bigfoot and maybe even UFO's...if the internet is to be believed...and I have never known it to be wrong!!
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