My friend finally agreed to marry his long-time significant other.
One evening, after the honeymoon, he was in the garage cleaning out his pack and sharpening a shovel, when his wife came to the door.
After a long period of silence she finally said, "Honey, I've been thinking - now that we are married we should spend more time together. I think it's time you quit spending so much time on the dogs. Maybe you could sell some of these tools and reduce the number of terriers."
My friend was startled, and a horrified look crossed his face.
She said, "Oh, darling, what's wrong?"
He said, "For a minute there you sounded just like my ex-wife."
"Ex-wife!" she exclaimed, “I didn't know you'd been married before!"
He replied, "I haven't!"
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