Tuesday, September 11, 2018

What You Can Do to Slow Global Warming

Bring out your dead!

NPR says that if you want to slow global warming, you should look to family planning, as having one less child does more to reduce CO2 emissions than all other methods you could try combined!

But NPR is missing an even better strategy for making the world a better place. They forgot suicide. If you kill yourself, not only have you engaged in radical family planning, but you have also (almost) wiped out your future carbon footprint. Fantastic!

Of course this blog has detailed the Inconvenient Truth that Al Gore left out of his award-winning documentary about global warming. 

In fact, Al and Tipper Gore's FOUR children means their personal birth rate is higher than that of Zimbabwe, Yemen, the Philippines, India, China, Guatemala, Haiti, Laos, Sudan, Mexico, Morocco, Colombia,  Vietnam, Egypt, and almost every developing country in the world. Ugh!

Not to be too big a cheerleader for the Grim Reaper, but I would be remiss if I did not point out that when you're dead you won't be lonely (or at least alone).  The Population Reference Bureau estimates that only 7.5 billion of the 108 billion people that have ever been on earth are still alive (about 7 percent).  So 93 percent of all the people that have ever lived are already on The Other Side. And the house band on The Other Side?  It's fabulous!

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