Carrot Juice Constitutes Murder

Listen up brothers and sisters,
come hear my desperate tale
I speak of our friends of nature,
trapped in the dirt like a jail
Vegetables live in oppression,
served on our tables each night
The killing of veggies is madness,
I say we take up the fight
Salads are only for murderers,
coleslaw's a fascist regime
Don't think that they don't have feelings,
just 'cause a radish can't scream


CHORUS
I've heard the screams of the vegetables
(scream scream scream)
Watching their skins being peeled
(Having their insides revealed)
Grated and steamed with no mercy
(burning off calories)
How do you think that feels
(bet it hurts really bad)
Carrot Juice constitutes murder
(and that's a real crime)


Greenhouses prisons for slaves
(let my vegetables grow)
It's time to stop all this gardening
(it's as dirty as hell)
Let's call a spade a spade
(is a spade is a spade...)
I saw a man eating celery,
so I beat him black and blue
If he ever touches a sprout again,
I'll bite him clean in two
I'm a political prisoner
trapped in a windowless cage
'cause I stopped the slaughter of turnips
by killing five men in a rage
I told the judge when he sentenced me, this is my finest hour
I'd kill those farmers again just to save one more cauliflower


CHORUS
How low as people do we dare to stoop
Making young broccolis bleed in the soup
Untie your beans, uncage your tomatoes, let potted plants free
Don't mash that potato
I've heard the screams of the vegetables
(scream scream scream)
Watching their skins being peeled
(fates in the stir fry are sealed)