Friday, March 14, 2008

How to Install a Security System in Rural Virginia



1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

"Hey Jim, Bubba, Duke and Earl, I went for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls - they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside in case the police come." - Cooter

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1 comment:

  1. FrogDogz11:00 AM

    I used to get sections of cow leg bone from our local butcher for my mastiffs. Since they're messy, I'd make them eat them on the deck.

    An acquaintance once came to visit and used the back way in to the house, and freaked out when they saw dozens of half gnawed sections of leg bones, plus the giant dog dishes.

    Plus sized deterrent systems work quite nicely.

    ReplyDelete

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